CNN.com - Death toll rises to 28,000 in Iran quake - Dec. 30, 2003 - So, who else is going to hell for laughing at the fact that the Iranian town nailed by the earthquake is called Bam?

CNN.com - Poll: Bush, Hillary Clinton most admired by Americans - Dec. 30, 2003 - I want to move south for the weather, but I'm worried that I'll wind up in the Bush 'n' Bible Belt. I seriously would have nothing to talk about with these people that wouldn't get me lynched.

I bitch about how much it sucks to be a Knicks fan this season in my fantasy basketball league post page, and Robbie the Tiger had this to say after the Vikes got knocked out of the playoffs by the disgustingly bad Cardinals:

"dana you say it sucks being a knick fan, and i would like to argue that it is worse to be a viking fan. then you will wither in pain as the vikings toy with your emotions by starting 6-0 and then losing to each of the 4 worst teams in the league, 1 of those humiliating losses knock you out of the playoffs and to make things much horribly worse, let your loathed division rival packers get in instead. the packers stole our division title from right underneath our christmas tree. to make things much much worse the loss came from 2 4th down desparation touchdown passes in the last 2 minutes, including a lost onside kick. who misses an onside kick. i mean what the fuck is the cardinals problem??? what business did they have to do that to me?!?! WHAT DID THEY CARE WEAHTER THEY WON OR LOST THEY HAD NOTHING TO PLAY FOR!!! THAT WIN EVEN TOOK AWAY THIER FIRST ROUND DRAFT PICK!! I HOPE THEY ARE FUCKING HAPPY THOSE FUCKING BIRDS ALL THEY DID ALL SEASON WAS SHIT ALL OVER THEMSELVES AND THEN THEY BEAT THE VIKINGS RIP ALL OUR HEARTS OUT AND THEN LAUGH ABOUT IT AND CELEBRATE LIKE THEY ARE SOME SORT OF EVIL ORGANAZTION ORIGNINATED STRAIGHT FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL"

CNN.com - Rare bird could face extinction, again - Dec. 29, 2003: "Often nervous -- they can die of stress and are kept separate because they can fight..." - Yeah? Then I say their evolutionary egg timer just ran out of sand.

SI.com - NBA - Source: Knicks fire Layden, hire Isiah Thomas - Monday December 22, 2003 1:33PM - Scott Layden was the dumbest man ever to GM for a pro sports franchise, and now he's gone. But... "The contracts of Allan Houston, Van Horn, Howard Eisley and Shandon Anderson will take up almost all of the team's salary cap space for the next three seasons..." So no one is going to be able to fix the Knicks for a while. I don't see why Isaiah Thomas deserves to be in charge of anything basketball-related after doing nothing at all for two seasons with the Pacers, one of the most talented teams in the NBA. Now that Carlisle's taken them over, they're finally living up to their potential and are easily the best team in the East.

I hate being a Knicks fan right now.

SI.com - NFL - Namath tells Kolber he wants to kiss her - Sunday December 21, 2003 7:00PM - "Namath was at the Patriots-Jets game Saturday night as the Jets celebrated their 40th anniversary team. Asked by Kolber, ESPN's sideline reporter, about what the team's struggles meant to him, Namath replied: 'I want to kiss you,' as he leaned toward her. Kolber responded to Namath's comments by saying 'Thanks, Joe. A huge compliment.' Namath capped off the interview by repeating: 'I want to kiss you.' before Kolber turned things back over to the announcers in the booth."

CNN.com - New terror warning heightens security across the U.S. - Dec. 22, 2003 - I seriously don't understand how we've made it so far since September 11 without another attack. It seems so easy for Palestinians to blow themselves up on busy street corners in Israel, so why doesn't that happen once in a while here? I mean, it's great that it doesn't, but it's got to just be a matter of time before it happens. If someone really wants to blow themselves up, and knows how to build a bomb and hide it in their coat, how do you stop them?

MSNBC - How 'The Matrix' Lost its Mojo - "At the end of the original "Matrix," Neo makes a phone call, presumably to the omnipotent machines listening in on every conversation. "I'm going to show these people something they've never seen before," he warns. "A world without rules, a world without you." Neo teases at a saga in which he awakens all of the humans around him—us, that is—to the artificiality of our lives by making it as plain as day to us. A saga, in other words, in which he tears down the Matrix from the inside out. This is the story we all wanted to see. Unfortunately, it's not the story we ended up seeing." - That's exactly how I felt about it.

Watched the third LOTR last night. Easily the best of the three. There were definitely some glaring differences from the book, but I can see how most of them were pretty necessary to keep the movie under 200 hours. I just don't think I can handle seeing movies in the theater any more, because people don't respect other people. I feel like going off on a rant about people who talk in movie theaters, but I won't.

CNN.com - Guinness: Scientist creates world's largest book - Dec. 16, 2003 - Who cares?

Mellow warrior: Viggo Mortensen - " I didn’t want to be the guy who, when you saw the movie, you said: 'Good movie ... but THAT guy ...' He rolled his eyes." - The funny thing is, that's pretty much how I feel about the LOTR trilogy so far -- awesome movies, crappy Aragorn.

Watching last night's Conan on Comedy Central, and apparently he thought of the Real Admiral joke before I did. Dammit.

CNN.com - Men denounce military's 'don't tell' policy - Dec. 11, 2003 - "Two brigadier generals and a rear admiral -- all retired -- disclosed that they are gay and denounced the U.S. military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy in interviews with The New York Times." A gay rear admiral? No way!

CNN.com - 1 dead after car hits truck carrying military munitions - Dec. 11, 2003 - Way to hit the one thing on the road you DEFINITELY shouldn't run into.

Anti-Dean Dems look for new tactics - "Dean has proved himself dexterous throughout his political career, running for governor as a centrist and president as a champion of the far left..." - I'm starting to worry that Dean isn't who I thought he was. The further left a candidate leans, the more interesting he becomes to me -- I hope Dean's liberal stance isn't just an act. Perhaps I've been reading too much politics.

I came across a list with photos and descriptions of the incident in which they died. Something to look at no matter how you feel about the war.

CNN.com - Viking queen may be exhumed for clues to killing - Dec. 9, 2003 - Seriously, get a hobby. Aren't there enough real-life murders for you guys to worry about?

CNN.com - Sheriff: 'No chance we'll find Dru alive' - Dec. 9, 2003 - Synopsis: They find a knife that matched a sheath near the girl's car in the dude's trunk. They find her blood in the car despite evidence that it was "extensively cleaned" (which must mean there was a whole lot more blood). Her shoe washed up under a bridge. Not exactly a criminal mastermind, just a sick fuck.

Breast-feeding driver found guilty - "Donkers testified she did nothing wrong because the couple’s religious beliefs require her to follow her husband’s directives. They belong to the First Christian Fellowship for Eternal Sovereignty, which has a history of challenging the government." OK, and my religious beliefs require me to rob banks and get away with it.

Magic suffers 17th straight defeat - I've never heard of an NBA team losing 17 straight... have I? Maybe the Mavericks of the early 90's pulled it off, but I'm not sure.

Frat Hazing: A Dangerous New Drinking Game - I hate reading bad stories about fraternities, because I know that if I hadn't been in one, I'd probably react to this kind of story by saying "Fraternities are the dumbest thing ever." I believe that this kind of stupid shit is more the exception than the rule, and that fraternities in general are a positive social influence both on their members and the college campuses they inhabit, but I probably wouldn't have that belief if I wasn't a part of one, so I can't blame people who read this story and say "What a bunch of schmucks frat boys are."

CNN.com - The hottest game on television - Dec. 2, 2003 - Apparently there's going to be a Celebrity Poker Tournament on NBC on Superbowl day... I need a TIVO.

Segways enlisted as battle robots - This is cool.

How to render the Segway obsolete - This is funny.

CNN.com - 'Master' and 'slave' computer labels unacceptable, officials say - Nov. 26, 2003 - "Los Angeles officials have asked that manufacturers, suppliers and contractors stop using the terms "master" and "slave" on computer equipment, saying such terms are unacceptable and offensive." This kind of stupidity could only come out of LA.